Date Rape

Dating and Domestic Violence

About, 1 in 3 high school students have been or will be in an abusive relationship.

1 in 5 (20%) of dating couples report some type of violence in their relationship.

85% of victimizations by a significant other are against women.

15% of victimizations by a significant other are against men.

About 4.8 million intimate partner rapes & physical assaults are perpetrated against U.S. women each year. 2.9 million intimate partner physical assaults are perpetrated against U.S. men each year.

Type of Violence	What It Means	How It Works	Early Warning Signs
Verbal Abuse	Behavior that causes harm with words	Name calling Insults Public humiliation Yelling	Teasing that includes insults
Psychological and Emotional Abuse	Behavior intended to cause psychological or emotional distress	Threats, intimidation Put-downs Telling a person’s secrets Jealousy Possessiveness Isolating a person from friends, family Destroying gifts, clothing, letters Damaging a car, home, or other prized possessions	Pouting when you spend time with your friends Threatening to leave you in an unsafe location Trying to control what you do
Physical Abuse	Behaviors that inflict harm on a person	Slapping, hitting Shoving, grabbing Hair pulling, biting Throwing objects at a person	Going into a rage when disappointed or frustrated Teasing, tripping, or pushing Threatening to injure
Sexual Violence: From Coercion to Date Rape	Sexual advances that make a person feel uncomfortable or are unwanted	Insisting, physically or verbally, that a person who said “no” have sex anyway Forced sex	· Using emotional blackmail to talk you into having sex (“If you loved me, you would...”)

Early Warning Signs of Dating Violence

Extreme Jealousy

Controlling

Manipulative

Low Self-Esteem

Unpredictable Mood Swings

Explosive Anger

Gender Stereotyping

Drug & Alcohol Use

Push for a quick relationship

Abusive in the past


Physical signs of injury Dropping out of school or missing school frequently Failing grades Indecision Changes in mood or personality Use of drugs/alcohol Pregnancy Emotional outbursts Isolation



If you’re worried, say something. Listen, support, and believe them. Help your friend take action. Encourage them to get help and get out. Call in reinforcements. Ending an Unhealthy relationship: Remember: No one deserves to be abused. Know that: It is never the victim’s fault. Talk to someone you can trust. Get medical attention if you have been physically harmed. Get out. Abusive relationships usually get worse over time. If the relationship is hurting you, it’s ok to break up.

Kevin is walking in the school hallway with his friends and sees his girlfriend at her locker with her friends. When he goes up to her, she gives him a cold look and says loudly, “I don’t know why I even bother with you, loser! I guess I just keep you around because I feel sorry for you.” Kevin feels frustrated because he doesn’t know what he did and embarrassed because his friends saw his girlfriend putting him down.

Jenny and Mike have lunch in the cafeteria with their friends. They start teasing each other, but then the playing turns to insults. Mike sees that Jenny is upset but doesn’t stop. When Jenny gets up and says, “Get away from me, I hate you,” Mike says, “Shut up” and slaps her across the face.

Tony and Emily have been going out for a few weeks, and he is beginning to act like he owns her. He complains when she spends time with her best friend- or anyone except him. He expects her to meet him in the halls between classes, eat lunch with him, let him go home with her after school, and be with him every weekend. Afraid she’ll lose him, Emily begins to cut herself off from her friends

Christine and Allison are in an intense argument. Christine gets madder and madder, until she finally grabs Allison, shakes her, and shoves her against the wall. Later, Christine apologizes, saying, “I’m not proud I lost my temper, but you really pushed my buttons. You should know better than to get up in my face like that, because you know I get too angry to control myself.

Juan and Maria, who have been going out for a few weeks, are making out. Maria has been clear that she doesn’t want to go any further than kissing, but Juan becomes aggressive, disregarding her request to slow down and back off. He forces her to have sex, and later tells her she was a tease and was asking for it.